Beach. Cars. Beats.

I’m gonna act like it doesn’t worry me, like it isn’t killing me inside.
Like my heart is trying to tear itself out of my chest to chase you as you leave.
No, because that makes me weak.
That gives you satisfaction in that I’m in pain.

No.
I’m gonna do me for awhile.

but they depend on how she decides to go about it. 

if she decides that she will take me back, then that’s that and we live together happily ever after. I’m hoping she will take this option. 

However, if she says she doesn’t want me in her life anymore then i have two options.

Firstly.

I could hollow away here, missing her. Hurting and wasting my time convincing her to take me back, having no success. Sitting here dull and miserable, continuing to write songs of heartbreak and apology and somehow hoping that she will hear them. Hoping that any minute she will change her mind and run back to me, clinging onto any chance.

Or Secondly.

I can take it on the chin, take it as an experience and learn a lesson from all of this. Take some time to better myself, work on the things that I need to improve about myself. Focus on my university degree, go out and have fun with my true friends, as well as make new ones. And maybe one day we may get back together, when we are both more mature and have established ourselves in this world, so that we can truly provide for each other’s needs and give ourselves completely, unlike now when we are young and vulnerable.

i’ve got some tough decisions ahead.

 

(Source: something-to-show-for)

All I want to do is write a song 
One I haven’t ever sung before
I don’t want to sing the same old thing 
It wouldn’t mean anything to me 

All I want to do is write a song 
But everything I say just comes out wrong
I guess I’ll just throw my thoughts away
Maybe pick them up another day 

I just lost control
I just wanted you to know 
When I’m on my own
I feel invisible 
I just lost control
I just needed you to know
When in front of you 
I feel invincible

I want to write a song that makes you smile
One that keeps you around for a while
I wish for, small things
Like losing, this feeling
I’ve seen this coming
I’ve seen you, leaving

I just lost control
I just wanted you to know 

When I’m on my own
I feel invisible 
I just lost control
I just needed you to know
When in front of you 
I feel invincible

I know I’ve said and done some things
That’ve made you feel a little empty
I’ve got a whole lot to learn
Every bridge I see, I seem to burn so

All I’ve got to do is sing a song
Tell a little truth to everyone
Sick of saying sorry when I’m not
But after a little love that’s 
That’s all I’ve 
That’s all I’ve got

I just lost control
I just wanted you to know 
When I’m on my own
I feel invisible 
I just lost control
I just needed you to know
When in front of you 
I feel invincible
Invincible

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